


philophobia

by wrenneclaude



Category: The Orchard - Fandom
Genre: Other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-01-29
Updated: 2021-01-29
Packaged: 2021-03-13 05:40:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,604
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29023617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wrenneclaude/pseuds/wrenneclaude





	philophobia

**philophobia** [ fil-uh-foh-bee-uh ]

_(noun)_

1\. an irrational or disproportionate fear of falling in love.

**Chapter one  
"teenage blue / Beep Beep Beep"**

I still remember the day when they asked me if I wanted to come there, to the sleepover. They were so excited because apparently the other guests were just their friend group. To this day I don't know the reason why they would invite me, such an outcast to one of their houses, for an entire night, and treat me like a part of the group... I guess I just got really lucky!

I was sitting in the hall at school, browsing social media, when suddenly...  
\- _Y/N!_ \- I heard a familiar voice in the distance - _you're going, right?_  
I was confused about what Shimoya was talking to me about, so I asked - _going where? also... Good morning, I guess?_  
And that's when I found out about a 7 person meeting at another friend's house. Shimmy told me the "entire Orchard" is going to be there, and later explained that was just the name of their friend group. It would be funny to chill with 6 apple trees though, not gonna lie.  
The Orchard was a 6 person group consisting of Zofi, Kjae, Cherry, Mox, Wrenne and, well, Shimoya. I talked to some of them once, but heard millions of stories. Everyone is so different from each other and radiates a totally different energy too. Kjae and Wrenne, both big introverts, but still polar opposites when it comes to the way they talk and act. And they all loved each other.

\- _So, what do you say?_

I could not say no to him. And just like that, I agreed to the best night of my life.

Friday came, and I got to meet everyone. The moment I stepped into the school Shimoya grabbed my hand and lead me to a spot in the hall where the group was. Some of them were way taller than me, but there was this one guy, who...  
\- _Oh, you're Shimmoya's friend, right?_ \- I heard someone say from another direction - _I'm Julian, you can call me whatever, I don't really care  
_ \- We call him Kjae! - a taller, bit more energetic person jumped out of nowhere - _I'm Wrenne by the way, pleased to meet you_ \- you could tell they're not good with people, but are trying their best. Shimoya once told me there's two people in The Orchard who use different pronouns than masculine and feminine, the first one is Wrenne, and the second one is Zofi, who also introduced themselves later together with Cherry. And then one more person came up to us...  
\- _Wait, who is that?_ \- He wasn't as tall as the others, his voice was different too, but he caught my eye for sure. Since I met everyone else from The Orchard, this must have been Mox.

The bell rang, and I didn't get the chance to talk to him. So I spent that entire class thinking about him, remembering his "key features" to later find him and talk to him before he goes home, because it was the last hour of school before the weekend. I never thought of anyone like this, it's like nobody ever mattered to me until now. But why was he so confused about me being there? I thought everyone knew already...  
After the lesson has ended I dashed outside to the school entrance to wait for Mox and talk to him, but... He never came. I even saw Wrenne talking to their friend outside, but Mox was nowhere to be found. And I couldn't text him, because... I don't have his number. But because I was thinking about him for so long, I thought I've known him for so long. It's such a surreal feeling when you fall in love with someone who you don't even know.

I went home alone. I didn't see anyone else on my way back. When I came back, I ate dinner and went on discord, too see a message from Shimmy. He sent me an invite to the Orchard server... I wrote that it's awesome that they want me there, but isn't it weird that I have just met most of them and they already want me on the server? He responded by saying that everyone agreed on inviting me, they don't mind. So I joined, and... I was greeted by everyone in such a warm manner, almost as if I came back home to a loving family. I talked to them a lot, I even lost track of time and ended up not sleeping until 3AM. Wrenne noticed it and sent me a message that went along the lines of "Y/N keep a healthy sleep schedule goddamnit". They're like that annoying-but-really-caring-parent! After that I did go to bed, but couldn't sleep. It's like something was missing... I didn't turn off discord notifications for the orchard, maybe that was just keeping me up. I finally fell asleep at one point, and waking up at...

\- _13:30! And they're still not responding!_ \- The Orchard was panicking. The overall meeting was supposed to happen at 2PM, but I woke up 30 minutes before that, and I live across the city from Zofi's house where the sleepover was happening. I texted them about the situation and expected them to be mad, but... all they said was... "morning speedrun"? I'm still confused about that. After dressing up and grabbing some essentials I ran in whatever direction I thought was good while my phone's map app was loading the route. After around 40 minutes of riding buses I never thought about riding and walking on strange paths that seemed to lead to nowhere, I finally got there. Zofi was waiting outside and greeted me with a warm hug. They took me to their apartment that's actually 3 stories tall (which explains the orchard calling it Zofi's "house") and there they were. The entire group! Except for one person...

\- _Where's Mox?_ \- I asked  
\- _Oh, he's not here? Where is he then?_ \- Wrenne seemed to be just as confused as me - _I'm gonna ping him on discord_

Shimoya explained that Mox didn't write anything to anyone about being late or anything, so all of us were confused. Now I know it's not the best thing to do in such a situation, but I asked for Mox's number. I mean, at the time I used it to contact him to see if he's still alive but now I feel bad for getting my crush's number like that...  
I texted him, called him multiple times, until he finally responded. And to my surprise and to the orchard's laugh, Mox's stomach was just hurting. He was already on his way when he wrote that message, so we didn't have to wait for too long before we heard a knock on the door.

\- _Hey guys, sorry for being late.._ \- Mox said while getting off his jacket and shoes. Everyone greeted Mox with hugs, I thought he will explode there! They all looked like it's a normal thing, except for Mox, who kinda tried to loosen down the hug, but gave in after a while. I wanted to greet him too, but when it was my turn, he just sort of... walked past me like I wasn't there... It was weird but maybe it's because he just met me? After all the greetings all of us went upstairs and chilled on a couch. Wrenne took out their guitar and started playing some songs, I even recognized a few of them! But overall it wasn't that interesting, until Zofi came back with a certain game.

\- _Twister!_ \- Cherry was super excited - _I wanna go first!_ \- And so he did. Cherry and Shimoya both started the game, and I was supposed to spin the wheel. I noticed Zofi passed me something, it was a note telling me to make the guys get in so called "suggestive" positions in the game. They smiled and I nodded, and followed the orders. I spun the wheel to make it look legitimate and started making up positions. After a few minutes it got heated, but they lost before anything could become "serious". Zofi told me it was okay, and later pushed both me and Mox on the Twister. I didn't expect it, I was really shocked but I just went with it. Zofi looked at me with a smug face, I think they noticed how I look at Mox all the time. I wondered if they were dating back then or something, but I didn't have too much time to think before I heard the first colours and body parts. I was doing what I was told to do, Mox as well. For a while it didn't seem "suspicious", actually, it sometimes felt like we were getting further away from each other. But then came the moment when Mox didn't have the choice but to get on top of me. I felt like in a movie scene, I closed my eyes and waited. I only knew and loved this man for a day, but already had so many plans and made up stories with him. It really did feel like I knew him for longer, way longer. But after not even a minute of fantasizing about him, I felt like nothing's above me but a light source. I opened my eyes, and all I saw was a ceiling with a lamp. Mox was nowhere to be found. I leaned to the side and found out that he "chickened out" and didn't want to play anymore. I was... not disappointed, but definitely felt... misunderstood.


End file.
